Monday, January 11, 2016

MailboX 11 January, 2016

This mail came in via snail from Fred Argoff. He publishes a neat paperzine called Brooklyn which is about — well, need I say?  Send him some carefully concealed bucks to the address listed below for an issue.  Regarding the polite Hulk and Godzilla kids' books he wrote:

A polite Hulk accepting lessons in manners?  Godzilla frolicking with his buddies and not taking out major Japanese cities?  Well, I have to say, the signs were there years ago...

When the Hamburglar stopped stealing burgers and became a happy-face character, you had to know something was up.  And then Yogi Bear — whose very existence depended upon snatching picnic baskets — metamorphosed into the leader of something called Yogi's Eco-Rangers.

As for the Vlad the Impaler plushie doll, I only hope that nobody from the marketing industry saw #113, because you probably just gave away a multimillion-dollar idea.  (Can anyone doubt that an animated movie featuring a kind, gentle Joseph Stalin is in the works; he can "liberate" eastern Europe all over again.  Then they can have a prequel featuring der Fuehrer, who, after all, asks only for Czechoslovakia!)

Fred Argoff
Penthouse L
1170 Ocean Pkwy.
Brooklyn,NY  11230

RX:  I wonder how your proposed Joseph Stalin movie would explain his "diet plan" for the Ukraine?  As for plushies, the next letter explains how the marketing department is already on the concept.

Via electrons Terry The Censor wrote:

No Vlad plushies, but loads of Draculas.

Even a Nosferatu plushie! 

RX:  My Gawd.  Is nothing sacred anymore?

Regarding my article, "Greetings From The Monastic Cell," X. Dell of the X Spot blog ( ) wrote:

I spent many a Thanksgiving and/or Christmas alone, usually because I had to work the holidays or the day after. 

How I miss those days. I've lost my best excuse for being anti-social. 

And to wrap up this MailBoX a comment from Dave Haren ( ) re: polite Hulk, TV westerns, and the Anita Nose Adjuster.

Somewhere I found a similar nosejob gadget designed to squeeze in the sides, for an Asian market, looked like a big clamp, very stylish indeed.

I prefer a Hulk throwing forklifts, automobiles, and spectacular tantrums. The best Godzilla movie was Son of Godzilla, started with action and never let up right to the end, they threw in everything but the kitchen sink. It reminded me of Robert E Howard at his best when the narrative of action made no attempt to be consistent with his other work. You were too busy following the action to care until much later. The thin gruel of consistency will never be better than the rich stew of quivering thew and racial weirdness theories stirred with a sword too big for anything but a canoe paddle for a weightlifter.

Like Penney I never could recognize the Western as having any resemblance to the actual west. I listened to the stories of my elders and none of the hollywood or dime novel bullshit was in the stories. The people  named were in real stories but their behaviors were also real. I knew a guy who was around a hand on his granddads ranch who was at the McSween house with Bill Bonnney. My own Grandpa knew Butch Cassidy, he came from a small town on the other side of the mountain. My own experiences with the romantic western life involved hauling a lot of hay and fixing a lot of fence, that and manure. It is like role players who adventure through a world where no one works, no one grows food, none of the warts of the real periods are there just the glamorous life of chopping up adversaries and stealing their stuff. The TV cowboy would have been hung on his first day in town in the real west. Canada had its outlaws some of who came south. I think the attached picture was taken in the territorial prison at Yuma, Arizona.

Warm regards

RX:  I was flipping around the other day and watched a scene from the Bonanza TV series, one of the most popular westerns in the old days. It was filmed in color.  I couldn't help but notice that the actress portraying a Native American woman looked pretty good with her Hollywood makeup.  Nice eye shadow and lipstick.  And some TV western fans think SF is unbelievable.

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