Thursday, November 26, 2015

Greetings From The Monastic Cell

Another holiday, another quiet day.

My circumstances are unlike most people.  No family.  And, yes, I do have friends but they're busy with their own families.  

I used to go out on this so-called day of thanks, meandering through the deserted streets.  Unfortunately the streets aren't totally lifeless.  One time I found a  guy passed out mid-main-street mid-afternoon.  When I asked him if he was OK he got up and took a swing at me.  Someone else was passing-by and pulled the inebriated ingrate away.  With two of us he decided to calm down.

Another altruistic incident that makes me to pause and give thanks for all the positive things in my life.

(Next time I'll let someone become roadkill.)

Today I enjoyed my traditional meal: a microwaved pepperoni-and-sausage Hot Pocket [TM].  Homemade goodness.

Keep your eyes on the skies.  La Carcagne could be lurking.

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Super Burnout

Back in the day westerns dominated TV.  Just three networks overstuffed with oat operas.  You had to decide which show would induce less saddle sore.  And there were plenty of hee-haw shoot-them-ups at the movie theater.  

Too much killed the format.  Ad nauseam.  There's hardly a new western series on TV. A movie theater is like a ghost town for saddle sagas, tumbleweed rolling through.  You have to watch reruns on TV to get your cowboy fix.

Now superheroes are the Big Thing, both TV and movies.  Irony: When I was a kid my peers and some adults questioned my rabid interested in four-color pamphlets.  I would be laughed at for spending 12 cents on a comic book.  Now everyone, not just nerds, are paying 12 dollars to see the same stuff brought to life on a cinema screen.

A surfeit of product means each one has to match, even beat, the other one. I watched the pilot film for the Supergirl TV series and maybe ten minutes of the second episode.  This set-up has Kal-El's cousin arriving on earth after he has become Superman.  Supergirl is supposed to be her own person - Feminism! - but there's always the shadow of the Big Guy lurking in the background.  This happened before with another series, Birds of Prey, that had Batman lurking in the background, a brief glimpse for Dark Knight fans.

With Supergirl I could do better.  An eight-year-old could do better.

Since the character is past her teen years why not called her Superwoman?  With superior acumen Marvel changed the appellation Invisible Girl to Invisible Woman years ago so it's not like there's never beenprecendence.

And have Superwoman be completely her own woman.  No more being in her cousin's shadow.  She arrived on earth but Kal-El didn't make it.  Why not?  It's not like the parallel universe explanation has never been used.

As mentioned before with a flooded market your product has to stand out.  But Supergirl isn't a stand-out creation.  In the pilot some Kryptonian criminals have survived, including Supergirl's evil aunt.  What's next?  Her wicked stepmother shows up with a kryptonite apple?

I'll pass.  I would rather suffer thru a stupid rerun of Bonanza. ("Hell, Hoss filled up the outhouse again!")

Saturday, October 31, 2015

Paper Cut

Usually perfection can’t be attained.  Bare minimum for me:  An adequate result.

I snail-mailed the last paper edition of my zine.  Why?  Not the computer but the printer.

This Windows-compatible  printer is the third one I’ve owned.  All three were crap.  This one started to print faint copies.  I tried the usual fixes.  Nothing.  I searched via Google for other fixes.  They didn’t work.  Two hours wasted.

I had to take my PDF file to a print shop.   Text was OK but the images were muddy.  A problem I could’ve fixed with the file if my printer had been working.  The file was uneditable so it couldn’t be properly fixed at the print shop.

Online the images look great, in color, not B&W as with print.

Since 1994 I’ve been cranking out my paperzine The Ray X X-Rayer.  No more.  I don’t want to waste money on another crap printer or take the option of trying to get adequate copies at a print shop.

Online writing and editing can be a pain but not like producing hardcopy.   Paper jams, dried out ink cartridges, smeary copies – no more.  Stapling, folding, envelopes, stamps – forget it.

There are holdouts in meatspace who are paper only.  I respect that but if they want to read my stuff they’ll have to do it online at this blog or at .

Good riddance to paper.

Time and money saved.  One stressful activity gone.

I’ll save my energy for more reasonable pursuits.  Like capturing a UFO.

Monday, October 26, 2015

Forget Waldo - Where's Nick Pope?

Are you in there Nick?  I can hear you… 

Good interview, crap video.

I click the remote control to watch another segment included in the DVD “Aliens, Abductions, & Extraordinary Sightings.”  This one is entitled “The U.K. UFO Sightings.”

This segment jumps right into a sit down interview without IDing the interviewee.  I recognize UFO Researcher Nick Pope from photographs seen online and in magazines.  For those viewers unfamiliar with him, tough luck.  You’ll have to look for clues in the interview.

Nick discusses his experience working for the U.K. Ministry of Defence’s UFO Project.  Unlike some UFO personalities Nick is rational, neither a true believer nor diehard skeptic.  It’s the first time I’m seen a video interview with him.

Unfortunately whoever edited this interview decided the average viewer suffers from limited attention.  The attention of such a viewer will wander unless you draw him back in with some visual tricks.

Gesundheit!  (Better see the doc about that nosebleed.

I don’t mind if a talking head segment runs on for a while.  Now if someone wants to show a photo or newspaper article to break up the generally static visual of the interviewee sitting in a chair, OK, no problem.  But I don’t want to be distracted by LSD inspired visuals, especially when they obliterate the interviewee’s presence.

The editor on this project was itching to use his new EFX program.  Suddenly some gooey gold stuff flows over the screen, an image that has nothing to do with the subject matter.  At another point Nick keeps gallantly talking on in the background while spreading red spots dominate the foreground.  (Space measles?)   And if that isn’t impressive, satellites fly over Nick’s face, hellfire obscures his image  -- enough, I can’t go on.

My advice: Watch the interview with the visual turned off.  It works much better as radio.

Hey, kids!  The interviewer is Alley Oop. (Oop, Oop, Oop..)

“You got peanut butter in my Nick Pope.”
“And you got Nick Pope in my peanut butter!”

Suffering from the burning itch of hemorrhoids?  Try Tucks medicated pads.

Doomsday 0 Ray X ?

© Ray X  10/25/15

I never got the memo.  The world was supposed to end on October 7th.

I can’t remember how many times I’ve survived Doomsday.

Previously in “The Ultimate Deadline” [1] I discussed another doomsday prophecy from last month involving the blood moon and asteroids destroying the earth.  The lunar eclipse happened with no incident and I don’t recall a massive meteor storm that spoiled everyone’s picnic.

Now we have another group, E Bible Fellowship, claiming the 2011 End Day prediction (another no show)) of the late great preacher Harold Camping was going to come true [2].  This group is based in Pennsylvania, an indication that the Keystone State cut too deep into its mental health services. 

At the E Bible website there’s a post entitled “October 8th” [3] that attempts to explain away why the world didn’t crap out, the usual backpedaling hyperlogic.  (The E must stand for evasive.)

Responding to the question “Did We lie?” E Bible says it had qualified its Doomsday prediction with the phrase “strong likelihood.”  That means there was a “small likelihood” that it wouldn’t occur.  So E Bible is left open to make as many failed predictions of Judgment Day with the “likelihood” escape clause.  QED as in Quite Easily Done.

And there was this answer to the question “Plan B (what will E Bible Fellowship do next?):”

“Some times people ask: what’s your back up plan? What are you going to do now that the world did not end on October 7th?

“Our answer has always been: we intend to keep reading and studying the Bible! Going back to the Word of God seeking truth is plan b, c, d, e, and every other option as well.”

Apparently Plan A involved the E Bible group ensconcing its collective head in its collective A.

Usually I avoid snarkism with fringe beliefs but this pessimistic religiosity is too annoying.  These Doomsayers should wake up and realize the world will end like a trickster in the night.

For those keeping score Doomsday remains stuck with a cyclopean corpulent cipher.




Saturday, September 19, 2015

The Ultimate Deadline

(C) 2015 Ray X - 9/19/15

Time is running out.  I am feverishly writing this piece, hoping that it will be completed and published, because I will die at any moment.
Why?  The end of the world will occur sometime between September 15th (Did you note we're still here?) and the 28th.
Yes, the end is nigh again.  (Yawn.)  I suspect I'll survive this doomsday like all the previous ones.
So what has set off the doommongers again?  Before it was Y2K screwing up all the computers, then some stuff about the Mayan calendar running out of days.
This time we have the omen of a blood moon and a group of asteroids that will smack the shit out of the Earth.
Why hasn't anyone learned from previous doomsdays that the end will come like a thief in the night (unlike the cable TV guy who never shows up in the morning).
With that question in mind I did some quick Google research to see what the experts had to say.
The top Google hits went back to 2011 when octogenarian Bible scholar Harold Camping said the world was going to end that year.  He divined this knowledge from his close interpretation of the Holy Book (apparently he glossed over the thief in the night bit).  Camping first predicted the cosmic crap hitting the celestial fan on May 21st.
May 22nd rolled around and guess what didn't happen.  So no doomsday then?  Not for a committed doommonger like Camping who dug deeper into his research.  He now claimed both the Rapture and the Apocalypse would occur on October 21st, a two-for-one special.
You know the rest.
Camping did put an interesting twist on his doomsday scenario.  The world would be destroyed by a series of earthquakes traveling from time zone to time zone. [1]  Destruction would first occur on May 21st, 2011 in the time zone that saw 6 PM first (Did that calculation include Daylight Savings Time?).  So long, Pago Pago.  We hardly knew thee.
According to CNN Camping raked in some dough.  Suckers -- oops, I mean followers -- donated to Camping $80 million from 2005 to 2009. [2]  Some of his followers were left penniless.  After all no need for money after the Rapture. Might as well donate Junior's college education fund -- he'll never finish his freshman year.  (That did happen.)
So here we go again, a new doomsday, a new circus.
Why do people fall for the End Times deception?
Lorenzo DiTommaso, a professor of religion at Concordia University, observed that doomsday believers try to reconcile two conflicting beliefs.  [3]  People believe the world is a bad place, that humans can't find solutions to many great problems.  On the other hand a "cosmic correction" will prove that there is meaning to existence, a Final Reward will be provided.  Doomsday isn't chaos: it's proof of order.
Shmuel Lissek, University of Minnesota neuroscientist, echoed the comforting aspects. [4]  She gave the example of someone anticipating a painful experience like an electric shock.  Once the pain has passed the person can relax (unless we're talking about the Executive Monkey).  Knowing the future takes away uncertainty.  Doomsdayers can focus on a common goal, preparing for the Big Finale.
I remember survivalist Kurt Saxon made a comment on his radio program many years ago.  He was annoyed with wacko conspiracy theories and the people who believed in them. 
He cited the example of the little old lady who lives alone, waiting for the day the government would round up everyone and put them in concentration camps.  In such a camp, Kurt said, she would have no more responsibilities.  No uncertainty.
Or as I sum up: Free at last.

[1] The Rapture Is Not Saturday; It's Tonight - Tina Dupuy  May 20, 2011

[2]  Harold Camping called “liar” who made ‘Doomsday’ money on defaced Wiki page - By Hao Li on May 21 2011

[3]  The Draw of Doomsday: Why People Look Forward to the End  by Stephanie Pappas, Live Science Contributor  Date: 16 May 2011

[4]  Psychology Reveals the Comforts of the Apocalypse  By Daisy Yuhas | December 18, 2012

Friday, August 21, 2015

George Adamski & Our Amazing CRT Solar System

(C) 2015 Ray X

“Wait a minute!  That’s wrong.”

A storyteller doesn’t want his audience to notice holes in his great tale.

In this third and last book, Flying Saucer Farewell (1961), contactee George Adamski had to explain an apparent falsehood with his previous writings.

George always had stories to tell. In the summer of 1947 he claimed 184 flying saucers flew over him one evening.  He even photographed what he said were alien spacecraft.

But his UFO adventure went into full gear after he reported that he met with an alien in the desert, a Nordic humanoid named Orthon who hailed from Venus.  (Any relation to Nylon of Mars?)

George received the usual contactee messages: nuclear war would end life on Earth, people had to live in peace, and don’t wear white after Labor Day.

Orthon took his earthling friend on a tour of the solar system.  George wrote that other worlds like Venus had Earth-like atmospheres, even all the way out to Pluto.

But there was a big problem, according to standard science.  As George mentioned the heat and light from the sun should decrease inversely with the square of the distance.  As one traveled from the earth he would notice each planet receiving less solar radiation, until a planet like Pluto would probably be a frozen lifeless rock.

Yet despite that inconvenient fact Gorge still stated: “I know from personal experience that [the] outer planets have thriving, with climates and atmospheres similar to our own earth.”

He had an answer to those skeptical standard science types.

In Flying Saucer Farewell George included a detailed diagram of a cathode ray tube (CRT), the device that enabled people to watch Captain Video on their boxy TV sets back in those days.

Then George went into an explanation about how a CRT worked, negative electrons, high voltages, various grids and anodes, whatever.

The reason why Mars and the outer planets received enough heat was due to three asteroid belts between planet groups that allowed enough radiation to flow all the way out to Pluto and beyond.  (The space brothers revealed our solar system had a total of twelve planets.)   Each asteroid belt was negative in charge, attracting the sun’s particles and passing them along with a boost.

The asteroid belt system acted like CRT grids and anodes.  As George summed up: “This furnishes Pluto and the last three planets with normal light and heat.”

Unfortunately George Adamski passed on to a higher level in 1965.  He’s probably living with his reincarnated wife on Venus.  Too bad.  He could explain why all the space probes have found inhospitable atmospheres on other planets, no sign of alien civilizations.

Maybe he would say the other planets are projecting illusionary holograms so that we can’t see their true surfaces.

Or better yet the solar CRT system broke and everyone went underground.

That demonstrates how dependent even the space brothers are on the repairman.

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Curt Collins And The Cosmic Rorschach Test

© 2015 Ray X

UFO researcher Curt Collins has always been inquisitive, not one to accept anything at face value.

For example: the banana peel experiment.

 “At age five,” he explained, “I attempted to verify whether [TV] cartoons accurately depicted slipping on a banana peel. It turns out, yes, it can be done."

Through an email interview he detailed how he set up his experiment in four steps:

“1) Observe cartoon. 

“2) Go on to carport and eat banana.

“3) Place peel on smooth concrete surface.

“4) Step on it while walking.”

But Step 4 failed to yield results until he changed tack.  He duplicated the scene from an episode of “Magilla Gorilla” by running and jumping on the banana peel.

“As I recall,” he continued, “the slip resulted in landing primarily on my right gluteus maximus, without any injuries or circling cartoon birdies produced.  The results were conclusive, and I felt further studies were not required.”

Curt always kept asking “How?” and “Why?”   Both parents were tolerant of his inquisitiveness.  His father preferred his son to pursue mainstream interests like sports.  With his imaginative mind Curt was drawn to areas such as comic books, science fiction, and flying saucers.  Back in those days such interests were outlier.

It was his mother who helped him develop his investigative skills.  He recalled how she was supportive, sometimes providing materials and advice.

One time he wanted to be a “mad scientist,” mixing kitchen ingredients until the formula started smoking.

“At that point I was urged to pour it outside,” he said, “and the lab was closed.

Ufofology drew his attention until the “Hangar 18” incident.

At age twenty-one Curt watched "Hangar 18," a low-budget theatrical movie billed as a documentary revealing the true story behind UFOs.  It was a great disappointment, even as fiction.

“It was advertised as if it was a documentary,” he said. “[‘Hangar 18’] promised to peel back the curtain of Government secrecy, or at least that was what I was expecting. I even took my mom who had some interest in UFOs. The film was so awful, I was embarrassed for ever wanting to have seen it, more so for dragging my mother there.”

Years later a real documentary, "Shades of Gray," renewed Curt’s interest in ufoism.  The film told the story of the late Gray Barker, one of the great names from the early years of saucerdom.  Gray is known as a myth maker, i.e., someone who enjoyed creating fabrications and put-ons.  One of Gray's friends was Jim Moseley, Supreme Commander and self-proclaimed court jester of ufology who wrote the zine "Saucer Smear."

Intrigued, Curt contacted Jim. They became phone and pen pals before the death of the Supreme Commander.  Curt’s interest in ufology would have waned once again but through Jim he found a new way to look at the subject.

 “[Jim] told me 99% of it was bullshit,” said Curt.  “But then he kept talking about the genuinely interesting cases, and the sideshow of wild, weird and wonderful people.”

Jim Moseley was known for calling bullshit with certain cases or people.  Curt carries on with the tradition at his blog, .  One case he finds genuinely interesting is the Cash-Landrum incident.

December 29, 1980.  Two women and a young boy travel by car through a section of dense woods in Texas.  Betty Cash is driving when all three see an unusual light in the evening sky.  Vickie Landrum tells Betty to stop.

A mysterious object, shaped like a diamond, descends in front of them, throwing off intense heat.  Both women get out of the car to view the object.  Colby Landrum, Vickie’s grandson, becomes upset and she returns to the car to comfort him. Helicopters are seen chasing or escorting the huge object.  After this encounter all three witnesses, especially Betty, suffer health problems apparently caused by ionizing radiation.

Curt called BS on a TV “documentary” series that exaggerated the appearance of the UFO, the dramatized recreation showing the object discharging lighting. (Not true.)  During the encounter the heat was so intense that a handprint was left on the dashboard.  Another visual exaggeration in the TV program showed the handprint had left a deep impression but in actuality it was a subtle shape.

Curt is a stickler for the truth.  More recently he participated in the Roswell Slides Research Group, UFO researchers who banded together to investigate the validity of an old color slide that purportedly showed the body of a dead ET from the Roswell Crash.  (Note the word “purportedly.”)

To Curt there is more than one answer to the UFO mystery.  He doesn’t believe that all encounters can be explained by gray aliens who sometimes slam their craft into our planet.  He stresses the first word in the term Unidentified Flying Objects.  He says that the term has become polluted after becoming a synonym for extraterrestrial spacecraft.
 “The UFO term is a crutch,” he said. “It covers a spectrum of sightings of things that may be caused by many different things, some of them unknown. Within that, there’s a subset that could be ET visitors, but that can’t be the answer for all of it, and we have to keep an open mind.”

He remembers Jim Moseley was fond of an observation by Ray Palmer: Flying saucers/UFOs were here to make us think.

Or as Curt sums up: “Stanton Friedman is wrong; it’s not a cosmic Watergate, it’s a cosmic Rorschach blot.” 

 * * *

Note: Quotations were lightly edited for clarity.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Lettermanati Is Finally Over

(C) 2015  Ray X

At last: no more ads or news items about David Letterman leaving the Late Show.  The omnipresent relentless push to tune in his final shows produced great irritation with this writer.  Of course the local CBS-TV affiliate had to carry stories about how some of the staff had met the talk show host.  Even BBC TV News carried a story about the pseudo-event.  That's news?

Years ago I wrote a put-on about Letterman being a top member of the Illuminati.  I used the gag with a couple of ultra-right-wing talk show hosts on US shortwave radio.  I called in, inquiring about his membership/affiliation.  One time I spoke with the late William Cooper on the phone, asking him about the images seen during the Late Show opening, a fly-over of New York City featuring various landmarks.  I mentioned how some buildings had pyramid shapes.  Cooper told me it was part of the hidden message.

The Lettermanati story was a yardstick to measure how nuts those SW conspiracy theorists were.

I hadn't seen David on TV for a long time - I thought he was dead - and was surprised the last time I happened to notice his program.  (His TV show functioned as a night light to my toilet.)  There was this old fart on the screen, telling lame-o jokes. Dabbs Greer had taken over?

Maybe I should celebrate David's retirement by spreading more BS about his Illuminati connections.  I could say he was a 33.5 Degree Mason at the Lodge of Moose and Squirrel in Frostbite Falls.  But there are those who would believe me despite tongue planted firmly in cheek.

I wonder if CBS will be conducting tours of the Ed Sullivan Theater after David's departure.  I would like to see the sex bunker with the tour guide providing a historical perspective.


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From Ray X X-Rayer #107.  To subscribe via email or to read archived issues go to .

The XXYYXX Files

(C) 2015 Ray X

His stage name even sounds Illuminoid.

Marcel Everett is an electronic musician and record producer who goes by the handle XXYYXX.  (Maybe he suffers a serious condition with his sex chromosomes.) In a 2011 interview with Noisey/Vice the young talent let it all hang out about his Illuminatism.  (The reporter was Aleks Eror -- now there's a Illuminatic appellation.) 

XXYYXX said that he was CEO of the Illuminati.  He owned the secret organization, had stock in it.  Asked about the conspiracy's plans for 2012 he revealed he was going to "fuck some shit up," create a global currency, assassinate some people.

Surprisingly he stated that Lady Gaga was not in the Illuminati, that she was "fucking retarded," that she didn't know what she was doing.  Hey, of all of the celebrities who would be a card-carrying Illuminati she would at the top of the list.  Her appearance reeks sinister Mega-Conspiracy promoting secret messages.

During the interview it's revealed Ja-Rule was CEO of the Illuminati until XXYYXX told him to "fuck off."

I wonder what the late William Cooper would think of this if he was still around on shortwave radio.  I can see his program, "The Hour of the Time," devoting a whole show to the evil XXYYXX, how the musician was pretending the Illuminati was a joke, hiding the truth.  XXYYXX, Cooper might've said, was acting as a clown to obscure the true nature of the Mega-Conspiracy.

An image comes to mind.  I remember seeing a blind dog spinning around in circles, trying to catch its tail.

XXYYXX interview:

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From Ray X X-Rayer #107.  To subscribe via email or to read archived issues go to .